Dear daughter,
A couple of days ago, something interesting happened to me.
I think it might be helpful for you if I tell you what happened.
In the end, why wait until one day it happens to you? It is better if you can get something good out of the things that happen to me.
I was with my friend Joe at the bar where we usually go to socialize.
Suddenly, a guy that I know from the same bar, arrives in his very nice car, a convertible.
I saw the sign “For sale” in the car windows and the windscreen. I couldn’t believe it. Why someone will want to sell such a nice car.
Because I know the guy, I asked him: why are you selling the car?
“I’m almost 70 years old, that car is not for me anymore,” – he said.
“Also, I want to buy a big scooter. That one will be enough for me.”
Let me show a picture of the car, so you can understand my point.
As you can see, very nice car. Also very expensive, at least if it is new.
“So, what is the selling price,”- I asked.
He told me the price. Then I got surprised.
Something weird started happening to me.
A feeling inside of me started to happen.
The type of feeling you can get when you see it is possible for you, to own such a nice car.
At that moment, I realized, I can own the car. I have the full amount in my emergency account. The car was kind of cheap because it is an old car. But is very well taken care of. It has only one owner and the guy doesn’t drive it much.
Then, I started to ask more questions. I could buy it, just at that moment. I didn’t have to wait or borrow the money.
I even sat in the car. Just to get the feeling.
I just saw myself driving the car.
I even send a message to him so he can send me more information. Ugh!
Then I left. I put a rule on myself of thinking things through when a possible expense that was not planned shows up.
The more I thought about it, the more I wanted the car. At the same time, the more I thought about it, the more I realize I couldn’t buy it.
“I see you are really interested in that car. Are you planning to buy it?” – Joe said.
“I like it, but I’m not sure. Other things are coming to my mind creating a conflict”.
“What is creating conflict?”
“I have a mortgage to pay. Buying this car can delay the mortgage payments for a few months. But most important, it can make me pay around the same amount I’m going to pay for the car in interest payments. I don’t think that is a good decision from the money point of view”
“You are right. Not a good decision from that point of view,” – Joe said.
At that specific moment, I realized I was dreaming. I wanted something that will cost me too much at this time.
The decision was clear. I cannot buy that car now. I must prioritize getting out of debt over everything. Only then, I can start thinking about buying toys for myself.
At this stage, a new debt was bad for me. Also, I remembered a lesson I learned after using debt to buy a car.
Don’t get me wrong here. I believe that it is good to spoil ourselves from time to time. It is nice to have toys. It makes us happy, even if it is for a short period of time. It is called instant gratification.
In my case, I learned that it is better to delay gratification, so later we can enjoy better and more, meaningful things.
And because I understand that in the current world that we live in, instant gratification is the norm, anytime that I’m in an unplanned expense situation, I take a step back and think twice. Is this something I really need? Or is it just an impulse, something that I feel I want to have instant gratification?
When I answer those questions, the course of action is clear to me.
And because of this, I decided I won’t buy the car.
However, I want to take this situation to warn the people I care about most.
I’m writing this for you. So, you can benefit from it in the best way you decide.
Also, I talked to my wife about it.
When she saw the car and heard the price, I could feel it, she got the same feeling I got.
Even my mom told me It would be nice if I could have that car here where I am.
Then I explain to my wife, that buying the car will be against our most important goal (financially) at the time, to be debt-free. I also mentioned how much interest we have to pay to the bank if we delay a few months the mortgage extra payments.
She picked up very quickly. Not second thoughts.
She understood so quickly because we talk about these things regularly. For us to talk about money is common, as we talk about any other topic. There is no stress between us when we talk about money-related topics. And our big goals are common. So, we both walk in the same direction.
Finally, we visualize how our life will be when we are debt-free.
Without debt, and after investing enough, we could buy the car without second thoughts. Because we could pay the price of the car without borrowing money. And in the worst case, we enjoy the car for a while, and if the gratification is finished, we sell it.
This visualization, encourage us to keep the focus on our current goal, getting out of debt.
Life could be much nicer for us once we are out of debt in many ways.
We can do more things, for ourselves and for the people that we care about.
At this point, I feel necessary to repeat:
- I delay instant gratification, so later I can enjoy more, and give more to the people I care about.
Love you, Dad.